What to Do When an Aging Parent Refuses Home Care

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What to Do If Your Elderly Loved One Refuses Home Care in Sonoma, CA

Talking to your senior loved one about his or her need for assistance at home is one of the most difficult conversations to have as a family. Often, elderly parents will begin by denying that they need help out of a fear of losing their independence. While this can be frustrating, it is important to stay calm and know that most aging adults eventually accept help. In the meantime, these strategies can ease the flow of conversation while helping to put the prospect of home care in a positive light for your parent.

Highlight the Benefits

Older adults often focus on the potential downsides of having a caregiver, and your parent may say he or she does not want or need someone poking around his or her home. You can counteract some of this negativity by emphasizing the benefits of Sonoma County in-home care. Does your loved one enjoy walks but struggle with mobility? Explain how the caregiver can provide mobility support and companionship. Or discuss how much time your loved one will have for hobbies or hanging with grandchildren if there is someone who can help with meal preparation or light housework. 

Get a Professional Opinion

If your loved one requires in-home care due to a serious health problem that affects his or her safety, then you may need to streamline your approach. Older adults tend to respect their physician’s professional opinion, and a private phone call before an appointment can clue your loved one’s doctor in to the situation. Many doctors are willing to state that in-home care is necessary, especially for seniors with mobility or cognitive challenges.

Start with One Service

Your loved one may refuse home care because he or she is concerned about losing privacy or the ability to live independently. If possible, choose one service to begin with that is most likely to pique your loved one’s interest. For example, transportation to a favorite social activity could entice your loved one to accept help. Medication management could also alleviate a stressful chore for your loved one without invading his or her sense of privacy during the transition period.

Suggest a Trial Run

Starting off with small steps is often the best way to introduce a major change. Tell your loved one that you have arranged for a short visit once a week so you can both can see how home care works and decide if it is the right choice for your loved one. Often, a trial run is all it takes for an older adult to get to know their Sonoma County caregiver and look forward to their visits.

For more information on home care Sonoma families trust, call Home Care Assistance at (707) 843.4368. We provide respite, hourly, and 24/7 home care for seniors in Sonoma County as well as comprehensive care for seniors with advanced conditions like dementia and Alzheimer’s. Reach out to a friendly Care Manager today and find out how we’re changing the way the senior population ages.


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